Living With an Ascending Testicle: A Personal Journey Through Childhood Trauma and Healing

Sun, 12 Apr 2026 21:15:00 +0200

Brad Snyder’s personal essay recounts his deeply vulnerable experience growing up with cryptorchidism, a condition where one or both testicles fail to descend properly. At age seven, a pediatrician discovered that Snyder’s right testicle had ascended into his groin, subjecting him to painful and humiliating examinations in front of his parents. The traumatic event left a lasting imprint on his emotional development. After several failed manual attempts by his doctor, the testicle finally descended before Snyder’s bar mitzvah, sparing him surgery but not psychological scars. The story explores how childhood medical trauma and shame shaped his self-image, sexuality, and future relationships. Snyder describes the lasting fear of recurrence, discomfort with physical intimacy, and avoidance of medical care well into adulthood. He later gained insight into testicular health risks such as cancer, torsion, and infertility from overheard conversations between his doctor and parents. Through ref